We're talking about money, not marriage.  One of the most popular posts on this blog has been the Dollars and Sense series with Judith Rosenthal, Senior Financial Advisor with Ameriprise.  So when I learned that Judith was interviewed by Robert and Holli at the Wedding Podcast Network I had to tell you about it.

In this podcast she discusses merging your finances and answers the following questions:

• Do you have a vision for your future together? 
• What is your money culture? 
• Should newlyweds completely merge their finances or should they keep separate accounts? 
• How important is it to discuss risk tolerance with your spouse to be? 
• When should a couple start to look for professional assistance with regard to money matters?

Here's the link to the podcast, and the link to the Dollars and Sense series, which has financial advise from Judith and wedding budget tips from me.

Here’s our last post in our “Marrying Your Finances” and wedding budget tip series with Judi Rosenthal of Ameriprise Financial. Tip #5:

Call in the Professionals: Many couples consult with wedding planners and meet with other experts before, or shortly after, tying the knot. If you haven’t already met with a financial advisor, consider scheduling an appointment sooner, rather than later. It’s a common misconception that only wealthy couples need this type of professional advice. The reality is, most couples can benefit from an objective, outside opinion. A financial advisor can facilitate constructive dialogs about your financial situation and assist you in resolving conflicts over financial issues. Most importantly, they can help you establish a written financial plan that takes in account where you are today, as well as your dreams for the years ahead.

Wedding Budget Tip: While working with a wedding planner will cost you money, if you and your fiancé are having trouble sticking to a budget and need help bringing your ideas to life you may want to hire a planner. In addition to running things on the big day, a wedding planner can help you find vendors and possibly get you some deals. She will also help you stick to your budget. Expect to spend a few thousand dollars, but having less stress while planning your wedding is priceless.

I hope everyone had a very Happy Thanksgiving. Since I’m writing from home again, and can’t upload pictures, I’m continuing our “Marrying Your Finances” and wedding budget tip series with Judi Rosenthal of Ameriprise Financial, here is tip #4:

Communicate, Communicate, Communicate: Financial discussions are seldom romantic, but they are an essential. Early on, be sure to define your lingo as even simple phrases can mean different things to different people. Finding out that your definition of “a lot” is the same as your partner’s definition of “a little” may be shocking, but it will help eliminate unwelcome surprises in the future. When arguments do arise, don’t point fingers by using the “You” word; it’s usually followed by an accusation. Instead of: "You shop too much on the weekends" try "I am wondering if we are saving enough for retirement. Maybe we can adjust our budget to increase savings.” Most importantly, always make sure each person has a chance to express uninterrupted thoughts on their financial wellbeing, habits and goals.

Wedding Budget Tip: While many moms and dads are happy to help you pay for your wedding, don’t assume they will be covering all costs. When figuring out your wedding budget sit down with both your parents and his and talk to them about the type of wedding you want and find out if they are planning on helping you financially. They may decide that they want to pay for something specific – the flowers, the food, your dress – or they may just tell you how much they want to spend and you can use the money any way you want. There may be strings attached when mom and dad are paying – using a certain vendor, inviting more of their friends – if you are concerned that their money will give them too much power or control over your wedding then don’t take their money. The best thing to do is set the “ground rules” when you decide to accept their help so that there are no misunderstandings throughout the course of your engagement.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I’m writing from home, and since I can’t upload pictures, I’m continuing our “Marrying Your Finances” and wedding budget tip series with Judi Rosenthal of Ameriprise Financial, here is tip #3:

Prepare for the Unexpected: No one likes to think about the later part of “for better or worse” but unfortunately, tragedies do occur. Make sure your spouse is protected, no matter what happens. Meet with an attorney to draft a basic will, or make sure your current one still reflects your wishes. Review and update the beneficiary information for your retirement accounts and insurance policies, and ensure you’re covered at appropriate levels. This is also a good time to discuss positive life events that could change your financial situation, like purchasing a new home or starting a family. A little preparation will help put your mind at ease, and allow you to focus on enjoying your time together.

Wedding Budget Tip: Wedding insurance is becoming more and more common. You’ll see ads on wed-sites and in bridal magazines and it may be something you want to consider. Wedding insurance will protect you in case a vendor goes out of business or you need to cancel or reschedule your wedding, but you need to read the fine print of your policy to make sure everything you want covered is. Some “acts of g-d” or weather disasters may not be covered.

Continuing our “Marrying Your Finances” and wedding budget tip series with Judi Rosenthal of Ameriprise Financial, here is tip #2:

Know Your Role: You and your fiancé would never fight about the grocery bill. Or would you? It’s not uncommon for new couples to split household tasks, and in many cases, its ideal. However conflicts can arise when one partner doesn’t understand how much it costs to fulfill a particular obligation. Take time to discuss your household’s day-to-day expenses, and then trust each other to spend wisely. If conflicts arise over small stuff consider keeping separate accounts for personal expenses. Maintaining some independence is okay, especially if it helps you focus on bigger things, like savings and retirement goals.

Wedding Budget Tip: When meeting with potential vendors, be upfront as to what you want to spend. Some vendors may ask you before you schedule a meeting how much you plan on spending. By knowing before you schedule a meeting whether or not you can afford a vendor you will save time by not meeting with someone you cannot afford. When you are asked what your budget is by a vendor, it’s better to give them a range not a set price. For example, if you want to spend up to $5000 on your photography budget, tell the photographer that your budget is $4-5,000. This way they know whether or not you can afford them, and you have some wiggle room.

One of the first things you should do when you get engaged is figure out your wedding budget. How much you and your fiancé want to – and can afford to – spend on your wedding, as well as finding out if any relatives want to contribute to your wedding piggy bank.

While you're talking about your wedding budget, you and your fiancé should also talk about your non-wedding finances so you can save for a home, retirement, kids, etc…

I spoke with Judi Rosenthal a Senior Financial Advisor with Ameriprise Financial and I got 5 great tips on marrying your finances. Along with Judi's tip, I'll add a wedding budget one to help you stick to it. Here’s the first one:

Map out Your Financial Goals Together: Don’t start your life together without a plan. While couples often share social, political and religious values, financial values tend to get overlooked. Take time to discuss your personal views and aspirations for saving, spending and sharing money. Then, establish some mutual financial goals and develop a plan to help you achieve them as a team. Putting your plan in writing can also help. It’s a great way to hold both of you accountable, and keep you headed in the right direction...even if the road gets bumpy.

Wedding Budget Tip: While the general breakdown of how much you "should" spend on your wedding is helpful - 10% on your dress, 10% on music, 30% on the menu – you need to decide which elements are important to you and your groom. Do you want a designer wedding gown? Are the flowers more important than the cake? Do you want the best band? Once you have a better idea of what your priorities are, you can breakdown how much you want – and can afford – to spend in each area.

Here are the rest of tips in this series:

• Divide & Conquer


• Just in Case


• A Helping Hand


• Help Yourself