Since I’ve been on sort of a wedding registry kick, I thought it would be appropriate to write about monogramming your registry items. You probably know that you can monogram your bed linens, table linens and towels, but you can also have your monogram put on your china, barware and silver.

Before you decide to monogram anything, you need to decide how you want it to look. What design it should have as well as the number of letters. To make sure I give you all the correct information on this topic, I asked Jane Scott Hodges, founder of couture fine linens company Leontine Linens to fill me in on what couples should know about monogramming.

Q. What’s the proper order of a couple’s intials?

Many modern couples wish to forego the tradition of monogramming registry items with only the wife or husband’s initials, and incorporate both the husband’s and wife’s first initials. In this case, the proper order is wife’s first, married surname, husband’s first. The below example above would be for Jane and Timothy Hsu.

Q. What if the wife doesn’t change her last name to her husband’s? Can you create a monogram with just first initials?

If you have decided not to change your last name, and still want to create a monogram, you can have a 2-letter cipher designed. A cipher is when 2 letters are combined one on top of the other. A couple can combine their two last names or even their first initials – sometimes it depends on what letters lend themselves to a monogram best. An example of a cipher appears to the left.

Another option would be to do single initials, one on each pillow of the bed, as a clever “his and hers.” Single initials add interest and variety when mixed with more traditionally monogrammed items as well.

 Q. How does one select a monogram style?

One thing to consider is what type of monogram you like. There are typically two types to consider:

Appliqué is a needlework technique wherein the design is “applied” using fabric stitched to another piece of fabric. The applied fabric creates the design or monogram. Appliqué is a rare technique that is difficult to find.

Embroidery is a needlework technique wherein the design is stitched in thread. There are several stitch styles and techniques to allow for elaborate and complex designs. The thread itself creates the design or monogram. While embroidery is still commonly found, most embroidery companies offer computerized embroidery and only one or two different stitch styles. Hand and Hand-guided embroidery is much more difficult to find, but allows for much more freedom in the design, stitch technique, and complexity.

Q. Do you recommend one style over the other?

From a purely aesthetic point of view, appliqué tends to be more bold and graphic, wherein embroidery appears more delicate. Appliqué is more difficult to find and may be more attractive to you if you are looking for something more unique that will stand out amongst your peers. For both appliqué and embroidery, there’s a wide range of designs that will compliment your personal style.

 

To purchase linens for your home or as a gift for someone else, visit the Leontine Linens Web site.

 

 

I know I did a general post earlier this week on registering for non-traditional gifts, but I thought I’d do a Part II on the topic.

I don’t know about you, but I love Gifts.com. Whenever I’m looking for a unique gift for someone, I always find the most interesting ideas on their site. I spoke to Megan, Editor of Gfts.com, for her ideas for creative wedding gifts. Forward the one(s) you like to your close family and friends.

Romantic activities to enjoy together:

• Hot Air Balloon Ride over Sonoma (other cities are available)
• Couples Massage
• Bed ‘n Breakfast Certificate

Great gifts for a group to get you:

• Top of the Line Grill or Fire Pit
• Hard-Drive Camcorder

Personalized AND affordable gifts:

• Champagne flutes
• Customized DVD of your wedding photos

The site also allows you to search by personality, as well as occasion, so check it out and then spread the word that you guys would love a specific gift for your wedding. There’s noting wrong with telling your parents, siblings and close friends that there’s something you'd really like. 

Many couples already have china, linens and all the other traditional wedding registry items and find themselves at a loss as to what they should register for. While most brides and grooms would love nothing more than cash gifts, you simply cannot tell your guests to write you a check. So my advice, go to your favorite stores and create a wedding registry.

You can go to a few traditional as well as non-traditional retailers – online or brick and mortar – and follow the usual registry tips:

• List items in every price point
• Pick items that are traditional AND non-traditional, remember grandma and her friends will go for the dishes and linens over the panini maker
• Don’t forget to re-register before any pre-wedding events (engagement parties, showers)

And my new tip: Look for interesting and non-traditional items at traditional stores. That doesn’t mean you should register for clothes at Macy’s or shoes at Bloomingdale’s.

I’ve been holding on to the Diane James Designs press kit for months. They are one of my favorite home decor companies, and at the Gift Show in January, they told me that they are available at Nieman Marcus. If you’re not familiar with Diane James Designs, they make the most beautiful decorative floral arrangements.

Anyway, they got me thinking. Many of the traditional registry stores – Crate & Barrell, Pottery Barn, Williams-Sonoma – sell furniture, linens, decorative accessories, lighting and other non-traditional items. So the next time you say to yourself, I don’t need anything, think outside the (gift) box, and register or re-register for everything from paint (Restoration Hardware) to pottery (Jonathan Adler).

 

 

When choosing a china pattern, think about how you plan on entertaining as well as what pieces you may already own.

 

If you plan on having the whole family over for big holiday dinners, you may want to register for 12 or more settings of a formal china pattern.  If you prefer a more informal style, and think you may have the gang over for weekend brunches and cocktails after work, you may want to choose a more casual, or fun, pattern.

 

Remember that you also want to work with what you already own.  If you have a set of china for entertaining, you can add to it, or find another set that compliments it - one you can mix and match with your current set.  If you already own, or you know that you’re going to get/inherit a set of crystal or flatware, take a piece or two with you when you go to register.  This way you’re sure to register for items that match it.

 

I recently learned about a beautiful line of dishes and beverageware, by Terra Keramik.  It is available in a rainbow of colors so you’re sure to find one to your liking.  You can order everything in the same color or pick a few different hues that match your home’s decor and compliment each other.  If you think these bold colored plates are a little too bright for your dining room table, then you can order just the espresso cups or the small dinner plates for use during dessert. Here's the link to their registry section.

 

 

 

 

 

Are you looking for a unique place to register for wedding gifts?  You may want to check out Branch.  This home store, specializing in eco-friendly products, sells everything including tabletop, furniture and items for the bedroom, bath and garden. 

 

Their products are very modern, and I have to say, I absolutely loved so many things I had to stop myself from clicking “add to cart.”

 

Branch has a registry section so you can easily register for items and add a link to it on your wed-site.

 

The coaster/trivet set featured above is one of my favorite items.  I think they’re great for entertaining and flat enough to store easily.

 

So as you know I was married almost 5 years ago.  In fact, the 5th anniversary of my bridal shower is this weekend.  When I got engaged, I registered at three stores - Crate & Barrel, Fortunoff and a local Brooklyn gift store, The Yellow Door.

But since we didn't need a lot of the items we registered for until we bought our own apartment, I decided to return almost every item I received for my engagement, shower and wedding.  I kept the All-Clad pots and pans, a baking set, everyday glassware and a few other items that I really loved - a punch bowl, cake stand and my lavender KitchenAid Mixer from my colleagues at Martha Stewart Weddings.  I may not bake a lot, but it's purple!  I had to keep it.

Most of the stuff went back and I held onto store credits and gift certificates until we were ready to stock our first home, which took place this past weekend.

Dave and I went with my parents to Crate & Barrel with a shopping list of everything I thought we would need for the apartment - gadgets, appliances, flatware, dishes, serving platters, wine glasses - and we filled a dozen baskets with a wide range of items.

Besides the fact that we had a great time, I thought there was a great tip in this weekend's activities.

You may get items from your registry that you decide after receiving them that you don't want them after all, or you don't really need them.  Don't think that you have to spend all of your credits immediately.  Hold on to them until you're ready to buy something that you need or want.  Don't settle for something that is going to take up space and never get used.  (Dave - I really don't know how much use we'll get out of that rice cooker.) 

Check with the store to make sure the gift card or store credit you get won't expire, and if there is an expiration date, mark it in your calendar so you won't let it run out.

If you get a gift and don't have a gift receipt for it, return it asap because if you wait too long it may go on sale and then you'll end up with a credit that's a lot less than what the gift giver paid for the item.  This is especially true for seasonal items that are only in stock during certain times of the year - Holiday, Thanksgiving, Summer BBQ.

So why am I so happy that I registered at Crate & Barrel?  Because they really had everything I needed and the saleswoman we worked with, Julie, couldn't have been nicer.  Since we registered in 2001, all of our credits and gift certificates were in paper form - not electronic gift card form so I was a little nervous there might be a problem.  But there wasn't.  We were there for over 2 hours - returning dishes and cookware, shopping and buying tons of stuff.  We ended up spending only $30 more than the amount we had in credits, which made Dave really happy.

And while I'm not saying that you have to or you should register at Crate & Barrel, I am saying that you SHOULD get detailed information on the store's return policy and find out if gift cards and store credits will ever expire.

I have $150 credit to Tiffany & Co - from our wedding - that I'm going to try and spend next weekend.  I'll let you know if that goes as smoothly.

 

 

A few weeks ago I was invited to view the new bed and table linen collections by Dwell Studio.  The lines are gorgeous and they should be in stores in a few months.  But the day after the press event, I received information for a Dwell Studio line at Target. 

 

The new line for Target has the same look and feel of the regular Dwell Studio line, but at a fraction of the cost.  I paid $50 and picked up 2 dishtowels, 2 oven mitts, 4 placemats, 4 napkins and a table runner.  And the table runner and placemats are reversible! (The bed linens will be available on April 14th.)

 

For those of you still deciding where to register, Target is definitely a place you should consider.   But if you’ve already registered at other stores (remember to pick 2-3) you may just want to swing by your local Target, or visit Target.com, and pick up some new Dwell Studio items just becasue they're fabulous!

While registering for gifts is all about what you and your fiance need and want for your home, you also have to think about your guests.

While online registries are great for your friends and even your parents’ friends, grandma and grandpa, and members of their generation, may not be so comfortable shopping online. They may prefer to go to a store and see the item in person. Pick at least one store that they can easily get to, and a store they are familiar with – department stores (Macy’s, Bloomingdale’s) and popular home chains (Crate & Barrel, Williams-Sonoma) are great options.

The older generation, if they can’t get to that hip store you love, may choose to buy something for you at a local gift store in their neighborhood, where the return policy only offers exchanges and store credits.

My grandmother insisted that I register at Fortunoff on Long Island, because that’s the only store her sister-in-law, Aunt Annette, could get to. So I did. And you know what. Aunt Annette got me a pretty nice gift…all my towels.

I know I’ve written before about the Martha Stewart Collection at Macy's, but I just learned that in addition to the kitchen tools and everyday items, there’s now a formal china collection, a partnership between Martha Stewart and Wedgwood. The china pattern featured above is named Ribbon Stripe in Rose and the collection is exclusively available at Macy’s.

I picked up the Winter 2008 issue of InStyle Weddings this morning, and it’s gorgeous. In addition to the beautiful flower story by celebrity wedding florist, Mark Held, and unbelievable cakes by one of my favorite bakers, Jim Smeal of Charleston, there is a great story on how to register for wedding gifts.

The writer interviewed several “wedding pros”, including yours truly, on how to create the ultimate wedding registry. Check it out on page 362!

In addition to these stories there are some beautiful star studded weddings to inspire you. And definitely check out the beauty countdown on page 201, the bridesmaid dress story on page 174 and if you’re looking for a unique save-the-date card turn to page 304. My favorite cards are the faux tickets (I used one like this for a travel themed shower), a paper airplane card and the “tell your story card.”

So of course it’s December 21st and I still have a number of people I need to buy gifts for — Torey’s husband Scott, both grandmas and Aunt Bobi (grandma Ruthie’s sister) — as well as find something for Dave even though we agreed no gifts. (Sorry sunshine, I can’t not get you something.)

So while I’m trying to wrap things up here and hit the stores I started thinking about wedding gifts.

The general idea is that you give a gift in the amount that you think the couple is spending on you being there. Now the problem with this is that how can you possibly determine what your seat at the wedding costs? Is it the cost of the food only? Do you total what you think they’re spending on everything — food, flowers, stationery, music and favors — and then divide by the number of guests? Or do you just give them exactly what they gave you when you got married 5 years ago, when they were unemployed and right out of college?

Unless you can afford to give the happy couple a check for a significant amount of money — say $100 or more — stick to the registry. You can always give someone a gift worth $50 or less, but you don’t want to write a check for $25 from you and your date.

And while many couples, as I’m sure you do, want cash or a check as a wedding gift, a gift from the wedding registry is perfectly acceptable. That’s why a registry is created — to help guests shop for wedding gifts.

What do you think is an appropriate amount for a wedding gift? Do you always give cash or write a check, or do you stick to the registry?

Do you remember the scene in Father of the Bride, where their anniversary rolls around and Brian gets Annie a blender? He thinks it’s something they can use in their new apartment – I think he says she likes to make drinks – and she sees it as a throwback to the 1950s housewife, and worries that that’s what he expects her to become.

A similar situation happened to us. I registered for a zillion things at Crate & Barrel, and my fiancé gave me one of the items on the registry as a holiday gift. You ready for this? He gave me a crepe pan.

While Dave thought it was something I wanted because it was on the registry, it was definitely something I didn’t want from him.

My point. If you think your fiancé will revert to the registry for your holiday gift – or any gift for that matter – let him know that the items on that list are not for you to give each other, but for you to get as gifts from your guests.

Worried he'll have trouble finding the right gift for you? Send him to Gifts.com. The site has listings for great gift ideas based on who the recipient is, the occasion, price and their personality.

Last week I stopped by the new CB2 store in SoHo. CB2 is the sister store to wedding registry mecca Crate & Barrel. The products are known for their great design, and there are items for every room of the house.

CB2 has three store locations – New York City and two in Chicago - but the website has a great selection and you can create a wedding registry at the store or on the website.

Since I’m already married, and can’t register again, I’m putting the trig desk and slim chair on my holiday wish list.

Wedding Planning Tip: When you register think of the gift givers. Register for gifts in every price point – less than $25, $25-50, $50-100 and $100+. Your friends may be on a budget, but mom’s friends may want to spend $100 on each gift – engagement, shower and wedding.

You are not being greedy by having a lot of items on your list. It’s better for you to have more on your list than to not have enough. If there's nothing left on your list you'll get gifts from stores you've never heard of, and can’t return the unwanted items to.

**The set of wine glasses, pictured above, are sold in a set of 12 for $21.95

If you're still looking for a place to register I recommend adding Macy's to your list of stores. (Remember you should register at at least 2-3 places.) Since I work a few blocks from Macy's Herald Square I've been able to preview the new Martha Stewart Collection, and I love it!

As you know I worked at MSLO for a few years and I've been a Martha fan since 1994. The new home collection is inspired by stories from MSLO magazines. There are beautiful items for every room in the house.

Now, I don't get to re-register but I plan on getting some of the dish and glassware items as well as some entertaining pieces. I've already picked out a blue tea kettle that's a must for our new apartment.

When registering for your wedding, add items that you need and want for your home. Remember to add some traditional items to your list - someone will want to get your your towels, linens or china. And make sure you have items in every price range. Some of your friends may only be able to afford products that are less than $25, while mom's friends may want to spend $50, $100 or more.

If you register right after you get engaged then make sure to re-register before your shower - about 3 months before the wedding - so that there are enough items for guests to choose from. Between your engagement and shower, some products may be discontinued or sold out. You DO NOT want to risk not having enough items on your registry. If there's not enough of a selection, guests may buy you something from a store you can't exchange or return things at.

I know someone who didn't re-register for her shower and most of the gifts at the shower were from unknown stores. She couldn't return or exchange any of them. I think she's still trying to get rid of some items 3 years later.

Thank g-d for eBay and Craig's List.

Have you registered yet? Where?

A colleague e-mailed me Monday's Dear Abby column entitled: GREEDY COUPLE CASHES IN AFTER THEIR WEDDING SHOWER. This I had to read.

Basically a couple invited to a wedding, after replying yes, decided they didn't want to attend the wedding after witnessing horribly rude behavoir by the bride and groom at dinner one night. The soon-to-be weds explained that they were registering for things only to return the gifts for cash back from the stores, and insulted the gift given to them by the couple they were eating with.

They wanted to get out of going to the wedding and weren't sure what to do.

Read the article here, and let us know what you would do in this situation.